The holiday season is already difficult and stressful for a wide variety of reasons, but for families who will be going through the holidays for the first time after a divorce, the unknown and confusion of what may lie ahead can be concerning. This is particularly true for children, who are about to go through the holidays with a separated family for the first time. In this blog, we offer parents a few valuable tips for how to help their children with this important time and help the emotional damage heal after a divorce.
Keep an Open Mind & Flexible Schedule
It can be easy to forget about the best wishes and desires of your children amidst the difficult times you are experiencing, but it’s important to remember that they are being impacted by the change in family circumstances just as much, if not more than you might be yourself. So it’s important to remember to give them a voice in the process and try to keep an open mind to their wishes. Find out what their favorite traditions are and try to make them happen if possible.
This may involve cooperation on the part of both you and your ex, but keeping your mind open and your schedule flexible can help your children remain happy, which in turn can help the holidays go smoother for your entire family.
Develop New Traditions
The holidays can be a “clean slate” of sorts. This allows you as a family to revisit things you enjoyed before, or perhaps even develop new holiday traditions going forward. Find something you enjoy as a family and make an effort to stick to that every year. This will give your children something to look forward to and help to decrease some of the painful memories that the holidays can bring otherwise.
Don’t Compete for Your Kids
Holiday gifts are not a time to try to outdo your ex in an attempt to win favor from your kids. While they may appreciate the lavish gift, kids can tell when parents are attempting to compete for them, and in many cases this just makes the divorce even more painful.
Instead of competition, cooperate and coordinate with your ex on what you wish to give them. This can help you avoid duplicate gifts and also establish a budgetary constraint. Divorces are usually expensive and limited resources usually mean money is tight for a long time after your case finishes, so you don’t want to buy gifts you cannot afford and then suffer the consequences as a result.
If you need help with your own divorce or family law matter this holiday season, look no further than the seasoned Rocklin family attorneys at the Myers Family Law Our team has helped families across northern California for more than 25 years. We have extensive qualifications that make us a top choice for all of your family law needs, including a Certified Mediator and a Board Certified Family Law Specialist on staff. Trust your case to our firm and let us show you the care and attention to detail that have made us successful for so long.Call Myers Family Law today at (916) 634-0067 for all of your family law needs, starting with a low-cost initial consultation!