Helping Families for 25+ Years

Co-Parenting, Part 1: Working on Your Relationship with Your Co-Parent

This month, Myers Family Law is focusing on co-parenting relationships in a two-part blog series. Today, we are discussing the importance of rebuilding your relationship with your co-parent. If you have a dysfunctional relationship with your former spouse, your first instinct might be to take the issue to court. However, you should first consider working on rebuilding trust in your relationship to avoid having to spend more time in court. Working together to raise your children will help them thrive, so keep that in mind before you decide the relationship is unsalvageable.

Tips to Help You Rebuild Trust

Trust is often a major issue for many co-parents in the aftermath of a divorce. For a more effective, healthy, and functional co-parenting relationship, you should both do what you can to rebuild the trust that was damaged or lost during your marriage.

Here are some tips to help you get started on the right path:

  1. Maintain consistency: Being consistent in your behavior and attitude toward your ex-spouse will be immensely helpful in rebuilding trust. Maintaining consistency means being on-time for picking up or dropping off your children, speaking respectfully toward your ex, and keeping your promises. When your co-parent knows what to expect from you, he or she will feel like you can be trusted.
  1. Never give up: Rebuilding a working co-parenting relationship with your former spouse will not happen overnight. You are probably going to get frustrated and feel like giving up. Do not throw in the towel. You need to continue to try to be civil with your co-parent for the benefit of your children. With enough time and effort, co-parenting will become easier.
  1. Be a good listener: Listening does not mean you have to agree with your co-parent, but you should at least understand what he or she is trying to say. Understanding your former spouse will help you become a better communicator, so you can more effectively reach an agreement on certain issues and avoid getting involved in too many arguments.
  1. Be willing to apologize: If you realize you were wrong about something, do not be afraid to apologize for it. A genuine apology is a powerful thing and will help build goodwill and trust in your co-parenting relationship.
  1. Be supportive of your co-parent’s relationship with the children: You should both be supportive of the relationship you have with your children instead of competing with your co-parent for their affection and approval. Your children love both of you and trying to poison their relationship with your co-parent is harmful to them.

Not all co-parenting relationships can be rebuilt if one party refuses to cooperate. If you have done everything you can to repair your relationship and your former spouse continues to be difficult, legal action might be your next step. An attorney can help you enforce a child custody order and protect your parental rights.

Contact an Experienced Child Custody Attorney Today!

If your ex-spouse is not cooperating with you as a co-parent and the behavior is interfering with the relationship you have with your children, the team at Myers Family Law can help. Call us at (916) 634-0067 to set up a consultation and learn more about how we can assist you.

Join us again next week to learn how a child custody attorney can help you during the conclusion of this two-part series on co-parenting relationships.